Milestones (Be Advised, A Little Vegas In This One, But Not Much).

I turn 45 in a few days. I suppose this is some sort of milestone on the (hopefully) long road to death, but I'm not really making a big deal of it and don't feel like it really IS a big deal. I certainly don't fit the normal societal "norm" of a 45-year-old. No house. No debt. No wife. No kids. Not even a fucking cat.

No worries?

Not quite, but about as damn near as you're allowed to be in this society at my age. I'm supposed to be the "responsible adult", fit that BS stereotype. Instead I've done about as much as possible in life to shun responsibility, personal or otherwise. When it comes down to it, I don't want a lot of responsibility. Responsibility equals commitments and time and stress and diminished personal freedom. I guess, in short, that I just wanna have fun, like Cindy Lauper. Is that shallow? Am I immature? Or am I one of the lucky few who has this "life" shit figured out?

Vegas the last 3 years has probably factored into this. It's possible that I could have taken the $12K a year I've spent there on average on a car or a better apartment or new shoes or a hamster (i.e. commitments). But rather than spending it in Vegas on good food and world-famous bars it more than likely would have been spent here on bad food and and locally obscure bars. I'm cool with the trade off. And I'm cool being the exception to the stereotype.

I'm going to a Giants game and going out drinking before and after, both alone, on my birthday. I'm doing this because I have no friends (by choice...commitments) and because it's two things I like to do.

But I'd much rather be spending it in Vegas. The trips to Vegas have become the milestones in my year now, much more so than a birthday that is one of the only times every year that reminds me I'm getting old, even though I don't much feel it.