Sick And Tired Of Being Sick And Tired, Again.

And here we are, sports fans, it's the yearly "I'm tired of being fat and I'm going to get into shape even though I say that every year and never do", post.

Since COVID lockdown began a year ago, I've been a disgusting glutton. When it started I was off work for a couple months, and did nothing but stay inside, eat, drink 5 nights a week and exercise basically not at all. In the months since about August, I've been onsite daily and have at LEAST been getting some steps in every day, but my diet has stayed horrendous, consisting of daily bad GrubHub choices, junk food snacking, and little activity outside of the 4 hours a day at work. The drinking has dropped off, as I'm now back to just Fri/Sat with that, but the overall effect on my health is starting to tell.

My blood sugar over the past year has spiked up to Uranus. It was more or less under control pre-COVID and now it's in the danger zone. I largely haven't felt the effects of my diabetes since being diagnosed, it's never really made an impact on my daily life. But now as my diet in the past year has consisted almost exclusively of salt and sugar, it's making me feel tired and any stamina that is left in this body is waning. It's definitely been noticed on the last few Vegas trips, I just can't hang anymore on long days of drinking and debauching. It's also killing my intestinal tract. Every day is either "whoa slow down" or "please go now" down there.

Without getting morbid, It Has To Stop Or I'm Going To Die. OK that was a bit morbid.

So, as of today we have embarked on the next, and hopefully last, attempt to repair some of that damage. Salads instead of KFC. Granola bars instead of Snickers. Apple slices instead of cookie dough. I love to eat crappy food, so it's not going to be easy, but I have 2 goals: 

1) I'm 52. I'd like to live to have a 60th birthday. Not kidding. It's that bad.

2) I'd like to once again not be completely invisible to the opposite sex.

I'm not saying, with either of those goals, that I want to either live to be 100, (I'm realistic), or find "miss right" and get into a LTR and all that (again, I'm realistic, and I don't want that anyway). But it would be nice to get to retirement age, and maybe once in a while have my drunken grab ass either here or in Vegas actually be successful. I don't want to die and I don't want to die on a 10 year no-nookie streak.

I'm still going to do my Friday night wine. I'm still going to do my Saturday all-day drinking sessions, as allowed under COVID measures. I'm still going to have a big sloppy burger or burrito on weekends. But by Vegas in a month I'd like to lose 10 lbs. By end of year Id like to lose 30. And we'll see where we go from there. Getting off of about 4 of the 8 pills that keep me alive would be nice.

I've gotten pretty much every other aspect of my life under adult control. I have a good job. I have a good credit score. I don't worry about money anymore. I can make adult decisions now about my life in general. All of that has come through will power, something that was in short supply in my youth. It's time to apply that to being able to not eat half a bag of fucking Cheetos every night.